Reaching my 500th post soon... Lolz... Just realised after looking at my blog's dashboard...

Went for Eric's Ge Yao Red-White competition today. Was kinda disappointed with the standard of some singers (sorry Eric), though I did like quite a few of them, especially the composer of the White team. Her voice makes my heart melt!!! Omg, her song really was nothing short of fantastic in my opinion. That was the most memorable part of that competition for me.

Can't wait for the holidays to arrive. Soooooooooooo many things I want to do this holiday. I want to really finish at least 2 stories in my 邱毕特的失误 and get round to finish writing the lyrics for my second song.

I've finally decided to let go. I really see no point. You're never going to find out I've felt this way towards you and even if you did, you wouldn't reciprocate it anyway.. I've learnt from 2 painful past experiences and I don't want to sink too deep. Best to shake myself awake while I still can. Time has helped me with this and will continue to help me.

I have finally completed my term paper for GEK1535. I've chosen what I think is the most interesting topic out of the 5, which is "Did Life on Earth Begin on Mars?". Lolz, I think quite a few of you all must be thinking that I'm crazy, which is somewhat true. Cuz I don't want to do something that everyone else is doing and besides, this topic caught my attention the most. If it can catch my attention, then I'm sure it can catch Dr. Lee's when he marks my essay, considering the fact that most people are going to choose the other topics, especially the one regarding socio-economic impact. Hopefully my essay will be a breath of fresh air or maybe something to chuckle at. I need a good grade for my essay! A+ for my essay please Dr. Lee!

I really ought to be sleeping now cuz I'm meeting Ms. Prabha for consultation tomorrow at 10am. Some more I'm not feeling well I really ought to get my rest. But the computer is just far too addictive. Thinking about tomorrow's lectures and feeling sian. I think I'm either going to sleep or stuff my face again in both Dr. Lee and Prof. Chuah's lectures.

Life's amazingly free after band practices have suspended for the time being. I actually go home on Thursdays now ^_^. Don't get me wrong, I don't dread band but it's a nice change being able to go home on Thursdays after about 10 weeks worth of band practices, especially since I end at 3pm on Thursdays so I don't waste a lot of time waiting for band to start. Thankfully I end at 6pm next semester, so there's no lag time between my last lecture and band, assuming I do get my Singapore Studies module. Don't fight with me hor people! Hahaha!

Planning for institution meeting this Saturday. Should I go? Sigh... Revision piling up, exams around the corner... But am I using all that as excuses? =|

"はい。" と　言う時、僕は　とても　嬉しく　成るよ。でも　いつに　言う？

Been about a week since I last blogged. Let's see, what's been happening?

Of course, Da Capo 09 just came to a grand finale on 23 Oct 09 with an almost full-house attendance at VCH, which I am just SO PROUD OF!!! I was really overjoyed when Benson announced we had hit 85% sales just before our final rehearsal on the day itself, which meant that there were actually more sold after that. I really enjoyed Da Capo to THE MAX!!!

Janet's wedding was on 24 Oct 09. She really just looked fantastic that day! And I got to meet up with my dear 4D1 '08 ex-students again. They haven't changed one bit, especially Wei Long. Ok fine, Wei Long did change. He's got this horrible fringe now that he keeps sweeping back every 3 seconds. It's an absolute curtain! But it's always hyper sinful when I go out with them. I missed SYM training and I ended up not doing an work on that day. =S Severe lack of wisdom...

And I think I've come to terms with my decision whether or not to quit band. I WON'T!!! I really love band too much to just leave it like that. I won't be able to stand life without band. I've figured out that the stress I've been feeling for the past few weeks was from two main sources. Firstly, my studies. I haven't been able to juggle and manage my time efficiently, hence the screw up. Didn't expect just two days worth of band would have such a large impact on me. Secondly, myself. I was putting far too much stress on myself because of my solos, which in the end nobody seemed to pay attention to. =P I've got to learn to take it easy and just enjoy the music! What's more, I think I will run for an exco position next semester, if available. Something that I would enjoy doing. It'll add on even more to my existing workload but I'm sure I'll be able to figure a way out, especially now that I have experience.

Well, all that sounds bright and beautiful. Now that band practices have terminated, I can focus completely on my studies without worrying about how my Tintin solo will sound like (though that also means the end of my eye candy for some time =P). My studies really are in a complete mess at the moment, which is not a good thing considering my end of term exams are a mere three weeks away. Three weeks to sort out 5 modules and JLPT 3. I'm more or less screwed. Hopefully I'll be able to salvage something. I haven't forgotten the promise I made to myself. CAP score 4.7 for this semester. Prof Bettens' tutorials are getting harder and harder to do. The final small group tutorial I just gave it up in despair. I really have no idea how I should go about doing it! Urgh... CM1101 was actually one of my more confident modules. Why do I feel so shaky in it now?

I need strength, wisdom and better time management...

Felt damn sian in school today. Really had no mood to study. Almost had to drag myself to CM1101 lecture, which is a surprise, considering the fact that I enjoy Prof Bettens' lecture the most nowadays. Maybe it's the stress that I'm experiencing now ba. Amazingly I understood what Prof Bettens was talking about despite my mood. Amazingly, inspiration came to me and I wrote half the lyrics for the second song. When inspiration refuses to come, it won't no matter how you try to squeeze it out. When it does, you sometimes feel miserable cuz you can't write it down fast enough. That was the way with my first song and I think it will also be the case for my second song. Hope the inspiration for the second part comes soon. I need to get into the mood, I guess. So far the two songs that I've written are pretty much sad and emo. I need to write happier lyrics.

Tomorrow I've got my 6-hour marathon again, followed by band sectionals. Gonna die liaoz.

Amazingly I've finished my formal lab report. Now left experiment 3 this Wednesday and I'm done for lab for the rest of this year. FINALLY!

Guess who I had in mind when I wrote those lyrics?

I'm blogging at this time now despite having 8am lecture tomorrow morning. In fact, to be precise, it's this morning.

Maybe I should just quit band. After the end of every band practice with NUSWS, I end up in such low life condition. I just feel that every mistake I make is amplified 10000 times, especially with that darned solo in Tintin. I'm just feeling incredibly stressed out now, especially when my concert is this coming Friday. I think I should quit band after this concert. It really is doing nothing but adding on to my stress level. I want to enjoy band. I love playing in a band, I really do. I love my instrument too, though I'm really not very good at it. I joined band to relax myself, to do something I enjoy doing. Why am I feeling more stressed when I'm doing something I should be enjoying? The best part is, it's my own perfectionistic nature that's pumping in most of my stress. Ironic, isn't it.

I'm tired.

I really want you by my side now. I don't care if you see the weakest, frailest side of me. I need you by my side.